Missing in action

back office.. for few hours.. now having a long long break.. have not got internet access.. happly holidays!!!!... so nice end of the year... except for my birthday.. everything is great..

every year when appraoching my birthday.. I get really moody.. maybe older must be more solemn.. sigh... so me been busi shopping for presents.. for christmas.. sigh.. very stress job..

buy for who.. wat to buy... sigh.. die lah... stress... hee...

life been peaceful and calm... she been really nice and trying... makes me so guilty..
I feel like spoilt brat..

She seems to be able to sense something is wrong.. i been detached and cold towards her..so she been doing small little things..she got a hotel room for my birthday.. I am very touched.. think maybe I have been too harsh and quick?? i dun know... I know she been trying hard to tok to me and listen to me...I have not really think abt wat really went wrong.. actually maybe I dun think is her.. I think it is me.. I craving for change... but wat change?

I think i need to pick up some dangerous hobby... diving... hee....

maybe I am too free....

damn.. i dun even know wat i want for myself... let alone for my relationship.. sigh...

For all the effort she put in... i wan to try to work it out... i have too...or else i will condemn myself... sigh...